THE Cake.

For most of my pregnancy with Lily, Claire had it firmly fixed in her mind that Baby Sister was baking her (Claire) a birthday cake. As in, that was her entire purpose for living inside of Mommy: to bake Claire a cake. We trace this concept back to a conversation we had with Claire about how Baby Sister would arrive sometime after her (Claire's) birthday. It was the best we could do at giving her a frame of reference, and apparently, the only thing that registered with Claire was "birthday," which obviously equals cake. So, for months and months, Claire would tell anyone who would listen about how Baby Sister was bringing her a birthday cake. We ended up explaining it a LOT.

It got more and more elaborate as time wore on: the cake was to be chocolate. With pink icing. And blueberries and strawberries. Once she settled on that combination, though, she never wavered. We decided that getting Claire a cake from Baby Sister was a totally doable gesture that could have very positive results in the long run. Thankfully, Lily's accomplice (my mom) did an AWESOME job prepping not only the cake but a proper birthday party for the day we came home from the hospital. I think all babies should have a coming-home-from-the-hospital party, actually.

Mom snapped this shot of Claire awaiting our arrival, and I love it.

Arriving at home! Claire is very insistent on helping to carry Baby Sister whenever she's in her carrier.

The decor. Also, Claire was pretty sure that this party was about her...and we didn't work too hard to correct her. We're all about creating positive associations with Baby Sister.

This shot was taken approximately 2 minutes after we walked in the house. We can go from not-partying to partying in no time, y'all.

It's FINALLY time for the cake!

First bite of the much-anticipated, long-awaited cake!

The cake was beautiful. Lily is really good at making cakes.

How Lily spent the time at her party. Bless.

Claire thoroughly enjoyed the cake that she had anticipated and looked forward to for so long, and we really enjoyed watching her make such a positive connection with her Baby Sister. Oh, and I REALLY enjoyed not being diabetic anymore so that I could actually participate in the cake eating. YAAAAAAY for Baby Sisters who bring cake! (and for Nanas who do the actual work. Thanks, Mom!)

PSA: A cake from the new sibling to the older sibling is a really good idea. Truly.

Lily meets the Family

Our families are actually the very best. I've written before about how great my mom and mother-in-law have been about taking care of us while I was pregnant. They each came to Durham multiple times to make us food, do our laundry, chase Claire, and provide general encouragement. I'm just not sure how we would have all survived without them (not to be too dramatic). Lily's arrival and the weeks following have been no exception.

My mom got here a week before Lily's arrival (just in case Lily came early), and my dad got into town the day before the c-section. On the day of Lily's arrival, Brad's mom drove over and arrived around lunch time. So, on her birthday, Lily was able to meet 3 out of 4 grandparents + one very excited big sister. How fantastic is that?

Hi, Lily!

I love this picture. Claire's face of concern and shocked suspicion is priceless.

But she gave Baby Sister a kiss despite her concerns.

Even though there is a lot of glare, I really love this picture with Gran and Brad.

With Poppy.

With Nana. Everyone wearing pink.

I was discharged from the hospital on Monday after a weekend hospital stay, and my sister was at my house on Tuesday to meet Lily. Amiee, who is a full-time graduate student at Baylor (in TEXAS). She had a job interview in Georgia, and on her way back to Texas, she had a layover in Charlotte. As she was landing in Charlotte, she had the idea to skip out on her connection to Dallas, rent a car, drive to Durham for the afternoon, and catch a flight from Raleigh to Dallas instead. How crazy and awesome, right? She was literally in Durham for about 3 hours; she played with Claire, snuggled with Lily, took a quick shower, and headed to the airport. #BOisawesome

All smiles.

But this is a more realistic representation of them.

Don't mind me...I was on drugs.

A week after Lily was born, Gran, Grandpa, and Ray-Ray came over for the weekend! 

With Grandpa.

With Ray-Ray.

We totally bribed Claire with M & M's to get her to cooperate for this picture. I'm not even a little bit ashamed about that.

So far, the only close relatives (outside of great-grandparents, great-aunts and uncles, and cousins) that Lily hasn't been able to meet is Uncle Tim. Not too shabby, Lily, not too shabby (note: she'll meet Tim in just a few more weeks). Thank you, family, for coming to celebrate with us! It was so special to have all of you here. 

Around here lately: April 2016 edition

She's still at it, guys. Enjoy!

Me: I don't know, man.
Claire: I'm not 'man.' I'm Claire Elizabeth Boswell!

Mommy, if you need help, ask me- Claire Elizabeth Boswell!

Anyone: How's your breakfast, Claire?
Claire: Yessssss!

Checking out the case of desserts at Aladdin's.

About to eat one of the desserts!

Anyone: How are you?
Claire: How are you?

I'm going to obey Nana and not say "No!" to her!

Can I hold you? Hold you hold you hold you?

(When leaving the hospital) No! I want to stay here and take care of Lily!

(Singing "You Are My Sunshine") You'll never know, MOMMY, how much I love you!

Trying out the new double stroller.

Gran, would you put your hands in your lap when I take care of Lily? (translation: don't help me- I can do it myself)

Can we ride the alligator? (translation: elevator)

It sounds like I need to go tee-tee... (note: she has her senses a little confused. There's not actually anything to hear when she says this.)

Daddy just went potty! Great job, Daddy! (announced to a room full of people)

That's my baby sister, Wiwwy.

(pre-potty discussion) No, thank you. I don't need any help. I just need some privacy.


Nana, I'm sorry part of your straw is missing. I ate it.

Eating fake corn with a friend whose mommy brought us real food for supper.

Sometimes my eyes get wet when I cry.


Can I watch her have the hiccups?

Being a Helper.

(at the store) 
Poppy: I will buy this stuffed Lightening McQueen for you, but you can't have it until you go poop in the potty.
Claire: We better put it back.


This Coke is spicy.

Poppy, you're so fun!

(Nana drops her phone on her foot) You can shake it off like this, Nana. (does full-body wiggle)

Claire: I made a bad decision and made a mess with my cereal.
Erin: That makes me sad to hear you made a bad decision. Why did you do that?
Claire: That means no television! No square nuts! No Christmas George! And no vitamins!
(Note: I did not tell her that she would lose any of these things. She imposed this punishment on herself. Bless.)

I was in your tummy then the doctor got me out and I was a little baby just like Wiwwy.

Is she done hicking-upping?

She said this was her "Rapunzel hair."

I just need some space.

Woo hoo! That's wonderful!

We may eat foot-long hot dogs from Costco, but we're classy, by George, and eat them with our pinkies up.

Good morning, Mommy. How are you feeling?

Don't worry, Baby Sister. Don't cry. We're just taking care of you.

It's raining TOO much!

That's the biggest tree I've ever seen!

Erin: I think she's thinking. (in reference to Lily)
Claire: About ME!

Grandpa! Come back! OBEY!

Holy cow! That's wet! (when realizing the playground slide was wet)

Daddy, you're amazing! (when Brad brought her a car that she wanted to play with)

I'm going to build an exceedingly tall tower.

Mrs. Katie, do you like the tall tower my daddy built? (referring to our entertainment center)

I need to keep ice and warm.

Mommy, don't drive off and leave Nana! (note: I was not going to do that. I wasn't even going to be the one driving, as I was still on painkillers.)

Doing her first puzzle!

What's wrong, Baby? Mommy, I think she wants her wubbanuck! (translation: Wubbanub)

I'll be Mary and you can be Jofuss, Mommy. Wiwwy can be baby Jesus, and Nana can be the angel.

(when a character on a dvd asks the children where they want to go on an airplane) MINNESOTA! And Alabama.

Mommy, I want you to have my medal. (a lei that she was wearing like an Olympic medal)

"Watch, Mommy!"

Claire-in-a-bag...ta-da!

A Baby Story: Lily

Disclaimer: This is not a gory or gross story by most standards, but it IS a birth story. So, if you are grossed out by birth/hospitals/surgery or things that happen during births/at hospitals/during surgery, I recommend you not read this post. Skip to the pictures or wait for future posts that are more about cute, squishy babies. Fair warning, friends.

For those of you who were around when Claire was born, I hope you won't be too disappointed that Lily's birth story won't be drawn out over two weeks. I should be able to get it all down in a couple of posts. My birth story/time in the hospital/recovery with Claire was very long, drawn out, traumatic (at least to me), and complicated. I used writing it out on my blog as a therapy, of sorts. It was my way of processing (as well as documenting) all of the physical pain and emotional ups-and-down that I'd just gone through. My birth story with Lily is almost entirely the opposite, thanks to a few factors that were (somewhat) within our control. I could NOT be more grateful.

Last family photo before Lily joined us! My mom took this of us after post-church lunch at Nana Taco (which happens to be my mom's- Nana's- favorite little taco spot in Durham). Also, Claire is wearing Mom's purse as a necklace.

Because I'd ended up having an unplanned c-section with Claire and, subsequently, my doctor in Boston had urged me to plan on repeat c-sections rather than attempting any VBAC's (vaginal birth after cesarean), Brad and I decided to pursue a c-section with this pregnancy. Most people, I have found, have opinions about whether or not that's the best choice, but after much thinking, reading, and praying, I felt good about that choice. Well, if not good, I felt like it was the best of my options. I also chose to follow my Boston medical team's suggestion of using general anesthesia again. This choice was more controversial than a repeat c-section, and I found myself having to discuss is a lot with a myriad of different people. I was literally still explaining my story to nurses while I was laying on the operating table and they were prepping me for the c-section. I've written about it here before, but here's the crux of it: every single attempt to insert something into my spine during my hospital stay with Claire failed. Three attempts at an epidural failed (and consequently gave me a wet tap that cause the spinal/positional headache). Three attempts at a spinal block for my c-section failed (which led to general anesthesia with Claire's delivery). Three attempts at a blood patch to relieve the spinal headache failed. Basically, 4 different anesthesiologists and 9 different spinal punctures led to a) a 100% rate of failure and b) a lot of trauma for me. I became completely terrified that future attempts would cause paralysis or something equally wretched. I knew that you have to hold still for them to insert the needles, and I KNEW there was no way I'd be able to pull off stillness in the midst of my fear. I had an anesthesia consult here a few months before Lily was born, and they agreed that general seemed to be my best option, which was encouraging. (Note: while Anesthesia felt this way, basically everyone else in the medical community thought there was no need for general and that someone could absolutely get a spinal block in. I'm sure they're good, but you canNOT convince me. You just can't.)

My c-section was scheduled for 8:30 am on Friday, April 15. I had the first slot and was super excited that I'd have a baby well before lunch time! I had to fast from all food and liquids after midnight, which was a little stressful for me- mostly because I know what a hard time nurses have getting an IV started on me and being dehydrated makes it so much worse. So, I chugged water and Gatorade right up until midnight and prayed my veins would cooperate (when I had to get fluids a few weeks ago, they failed to get a line started in both wrists and finally got one in the crook of my arm. It was a VERY uncomfortable process). I didn't sleep very well (all the fluids + pregnancy = lots of trips to the bathroom), so I spent a lot of time praying and listening to some worship music. I listened to this song on repeat for quite a while. A few hours later, while trying to stay calm in the OR, I sang it over and over in my head and was really thankful I'd listened to it so many times.

We (Brad, Mom, and me- my dad stayed at the house with Claire) headed to the hospital a little after 6:00 am and were in a pre-op room shortly before 7. We got there right around a shift change in the nurses, but it was perfectly timed, I thought, because the nurse who came in to start my IV got it started on her first try (!) right before she clocked out. I was so very grateful. With the shift change, I was assigned the absolute best two nurses to take care of me through surgery and recovery: Reagan and Laura. They came in to continue prepping me, and I got really tickled when I realized that one of them was named Laura; when I went in for my c-section with Claire in Boston, my nurse was named Laura, and she was an absolute blessing. I had just begun suffering from my spinal headache and could hardly hold my head up while they were trying to start my spinal block. So, Laura #1 literally held my head in her hands to provide me with enough relief to sit still for the anesthesiologist. I thought that having a second Laura was a really nice touch for Lily's story.

Laura and Reagan were absolutely the sweetest as they prepped me and talked me through what was about to happen. They were great at encouraging me and keeping me calm. I can't say the same for the anesthesiologist and her assistant; they ended up being great later on, but during pre-op, they kind of freaked me out with all of the worst-case scenarios (I realize they have to explain those things to me- legally- but everything was presented in such a "are you sure you want to do this?" kind of way that it was very unnerving). It also stressed me out that they kept referring to "my decision" to use general anesthesia and the fact that it was "more of a risk," which served to make me feel like I'd made a decision that was unnecessarily putting myself and my baby at risk (which was not at all how I'd viewed the decision, especially since the anesthesiologist that I'd consulted with earlier had been fully supportive). All this to say, by the time I was walking into the operating room, my nerves were not as calm as I'd hoped for.

The operating room felt cramped, given that there were about 10 or so doctors and nurses getting things set up (my OB, the anesthesiologist and her assistant, the peds team, and several nurses). I got all settled on the operating table (which, by the way, felt entirely too small for a full-term pregnant woman) and tried to stay calm while everyone bustled around me setting up lights, curtains, surgical instruments, and baby-taking-care-of equipment. It was at this point that the anesthesiologist and her assistant became a little more warm and encouraging, chatting with me about how I'd lived in Boston and how the anesthesiologist had minored in history in undergrad. They also told me they wouldn't strap my arms down until I was asleep, which was nice; that part is kind of freaky. Right before they started the drugs, they did make a loud announcement to the room to quiet down, which sort of made me feel like a celebrity. Brad wasn't allowed to come in until after I was under, so I was actually never aware of him in the OR. By the time he came in, I was completely under, had a breathing tube in, and the doctor had actually already started the surgery. Brad got in there at 8:30, and Lily was born at 8:31. We learned that they move very quickly when the mother is under general anesthesia so that the baby is barely affected by it. Brad got to watch the peds team take over care of Lily (she scored a 9 on her Apgar the first time!). 

All suited up!

So glad Brad could be there this time.

Brad and Lily headed to the nursery, and they took me to the recovery room where Mom was waiting. When I woke up after Claire was born, my first questions were about whether or not she was actually a girl (right before my surgery, Brad had joked that she might actually be a boy, stressing me out about all of the pink things back at our apartment), and this time, I woke up asking about whether or not Brad had named the baby. Important information, friends. I was also apologizing a lot...for some reason?

Someone got me some ice chips and helped me sit up, so that I could work toward being able to hold my baby. And when I did get to hold her, I agreed with what Brad had been thinking while he was with her: she was definitely a little Lily Catherine Boswell. FINALLY. We had the right name that we both loved. And she was just so pretty. It was a great moment: I got to see my baby, she was very cute, and we finally had a name for her. Also? I WASN'T PREGNANT ANYMORE. Or diabetic! Yay!

Reagan, Laura, me, and a bundle of Lily

Everything was going incredibly smoothly with only one hiccup: while there is always bleeding post-partum, after nursing Lily for the first time, I felt myself losing A LOT of blood. I mentioned it to one of the nurses, who took a peek and promptly went to get the OB. Everyone stayed pretty calm but went to work immediately. They explained that I was passing a large number of blood clots (gross wording, I know. Sorry about that.) and needed to get that under control. My OB began clearing out a rather large amount of clotting, which was an EXTREMELY UNCOMFORTABLE experience for me. I was trying not to freak out about the pain or the blood loss (since there were several people in the room, and I was trying to be cool...obviously, this is the goal throughout the birthing experience, am I right?), but man, it was kind of an awful experience. They also started me on some pitocin to speed up my post-delivery contractions, helping to stop the excessive bleeding. After he finished, he and the nurses all commended me on my pain tolerance (I believe the words used were, "most people would have tried to crawl off the bed during that procedure"), so I'm thinking I did well in the "be cool" department. But, gosh, it was awful.

I had another round of blood loss later that night, and unfortunately for me, I actually caught a glimpse of it which completely terrified me and made me feel like I was going to be sick. I later learned that they had almost given me a blood transfusion because of the amount of blood lost. I'm still trying to figure out why they felt that telling me that information was helpful. All it did was make me nervous about any more blood that I lost (even the normal amounts).

Thankfully, outside of the blood loss, there were no other dramatic events during our hospital stay (which was only 3 nights this time, rather than 6). It was so vastly different from Claire's birth, and I'm really thankful for such a different experience. Lily came into the world peacefully and calmly, very much like her personality. We are so grateful for her and have been thoroughly enjoying getting to know her sweet self. Welcome to our family, little Lily!

Lily Catherine. More stories to come.