Dearest Hallie,
It is still beyond me that you are already 3 months old. I know I say that every month, but the truth is...the time with my babies always goes by at lightspeed. Phrases like "Slow down, time" and "the days are long but the years are short" are extremely overused, but they've become so because they are unbelievably true. I am trying so desperately not to wish away any minutes of your babyhood.
When Claire was a baby, every day and week, month and developmental stage felt very long. Not in a bad way- just as if I had time to soak things in and fall into real rhythms. Four babies down the road, though, I'm a veteran and know that if I even blink, you'll be one year old. So, I'm trying not to blink, and I haven't begrudged any lack of sleep, either. I know SO WELL that I'll be sleeping full nights regularly before I know it...and you'll be such a big girl.
While I'm reflecting on sleep and how sad I'll be when you're such a big girl, I'll go ahead and congratulate you on consistently sleeping 7-8 hours each night! What a good girl! I'm so proud of you. You slept your first 7 hour stretch (10:30 pm-5:30 am) on November 2 (just shy of 10 weeks). You are the best baby.
You've been getting your own look over the past couple of weeks, and we're loving watching it. And you're smiling- intentionally- more and more. You give out your happy, happy smiles so freely and bring so much joy to everyone. I don't have solid proof of it, but I'm pretty convinced that you also gave us your first cackle-laugh. Hand to the heavens.
Unfortunately, you've been a smidge colicky for a short amount of time in the evenings for the past couple of weeks. It makes us all so sad to watch you try to get rid of your tummy pain. It only lasts for about 20-ish minutes (unless we can't soothe you quickly), but it just breaks my heart to see. Outside of those times, you still don't cry very much. We still love you for that.
Before you were born, I had read parents of babies born during this year of COVID write about how, because no one really goes anywhere right now, their babies really hate car seats. It makes sense that babies who are almost never in their car seats would HATE them. I won't say that you HATE yours, but you aren't exactly a fan. You're a true baby of the year of the COVID.
This month has held a few disappointments for me that have made me sad and a little blue. On one of those occasions, I happened to look over at you, and you smiled so big at me. I was reminded so forcibly of the grace of an unexpected joy. Which you are! You were so unexpected and are an immense joy. Your smile that day made me smile and brought joy to my heart. I've always known that the Lord gave us your name very specifically, and it's in moments like these, when I feel alone and sad, that I look at you and you, your very existence, remind me to praise the Lord.
We are so thankful for you, Hallie. You are such a joy to us always.
Love,
Mommy
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